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...many unanswered questions live within me afraid to uncover them - because of the blasphemy - If there be God - please forgive me - When I try to raise my thoughts to Heaven - there is such convicting emptiness that those very thoughts return like sharp knives & hurt my very soul. - I am told God loves me - and yet the reality of darkness & coldness & emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. Did I make a mistake in surrendering blindly to the Call of the Sacred Heart? - addressed to Jesus, at the suggestion of a confessor, undated...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mother Teresa's Crisis of Faith | 8/23/2007 | See Source »

...first half of 1948, Teresa took a basic medical course before launching herself alone onto the streets of Calcutta. She wrote, "My soul at present is in perfect peace and joy." Kolodiejchuk includes her moving description of her first day on the job: "The old man lying on the street - not wanted - all alone just sick and dying - I gave him carborsone and water to drink and the old Man - was so strangely grateful ... Then we went to Taltala Bazaar, and there was a very poor woman dying I think of starvation more than TB ... I gave her something which...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mother Teresa's Crisis of Faith | 8/23/2007 | See Source »

...suggestion of a confessor, she wrote the agonized plea that begins this section, in which she explored the theological worst-possible-case implications of her dilemma. That letter and another one from 1959 ("What do I labour for? If there be no God - there can be no soul - if there is no Soul then Jesus - You also are not true") are the only two that sound any note of doubt of God's existence. But she frequently bemoaned an inability to pray: "I utter words of Community prayers - and try my utmost to get out of every word the sweetness...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mother Teresa's Crisis of Faith | 8/23/2007 | See Source »

...reported being "in the tunnel" once more. And although, as we shall see, she found a way to accept the absence, it never lifted again. Five years after her Nobel, a Jesuit priest in the Calcutta province noted that "Mother came ... to speak about the excruciating night in her soul. It was not a passing phase but had gone on for years." A 1995 letter discussed her "spiritual dryness." She died...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mother Teresa's Crisis of Faith | 8/23/2007 | See Source »

...Explanations Tell me, Father, why is there so much pain and darkness in my soul? - to the Rev. Lawrence Picachy, August...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mother Teresa's Crisis of Faith | 8/23/2007 | See Source »

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