Word: spam
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...nongeek wouldn't have thought twice. But I say, ``Raster, you have Spam for brains. It should be an exact multiple of eight!'' Evidently my brother's new box came with one of those defective chips that makes errors when the numbers get really...
...birthday present he wishes he'd gotten: It's a can of potted Meat Product. I think it 's in the Spam family and the Beenie Weenie family. One of the main ingredients, which would have made it great had I gotten it for a present, was "partially de-fated, cooked, fatty pork tissue." I'd have just pealed back the lid and stuck a candle in it, then cut every body a slice...
Embedded in the stories of World War II is the legend of Spam, the manufactured ham substitute put out by the Hormel Co. in Minnesota. Spam was a wartime triumph, but the legend is mostly wrong. Several months ago, Hormel celebrated the production of the 5 billionth can of Spam and tried again to explain that the stuff was not included in G.I. rations or fired, as cartoonists claimed, at the enemy or dropped from planes to neutralize hostile populations. Spam -- 15 million cans a week -- went to feed the British and the Russians through lend-lease, the $50 billion...
British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher recalled "feasting" on Spam as a girl in the war years. Soviet boss Nikita Khrushchev claimed, "Without Spam, we wouldn't have been able to feed our army." G.I. ration or not, Supreme Commander Eisenhower got a taste and encouraged the fiction. "I ate Spam along with millions of soldiers," he claimed. Hormel glories in the tales and lets the jokes continue to roll: "The ham that didn't pass its physical. The meatball without basic training...
...money from real science. Why? Because last week man -- that clunky, bulky, heaving, breathing space lunk -- saved Hubble. And Hubble, the $1.6 billion orbiting telescope, is the kind of robot observer that scientists like to claim is the real way to explore space, far better than the clumsy Spam-in-a-can bipeds we periodically and extravagantly hurl into orbit. Well, now that man has done this for the robots, it is time for the robots and their human advocates to shut up, for at least a week or two, about the waste and expense of manned space exploration...