Word: spandex
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...would have been a mean little joke if the man's actual last name was Multi-Millionaire--a man who didn't have a dime to his name.) Watching the show was like watching a train wreck in slow motion--from the hostess dressed in ill-fitting gold, sequined spandex (my co-editor points out that no one should bare their shoulders at a religious event) to the millionaire's family and friends rating the various girls' swimwear to the poor attempts by the contestants to mask the importance of money in their decision to appear on the show (such...
Kurt Angle was an Olympic champion. She's doubtful, and certainly not impressed. Another invigorating fight matches The Godfather, wrestler and part-time pimp, against some no-name pretty boy. Smoothness personified, The Godfather literally dances around the ring while his "ho train" (a bevy of woman wearing some spandex and bikinis), cheer him on and jiggle. "Ugh!" Christina groans. I nod, but believe this guy to be the epitome of masculine authority--the women obey his every word, bow to his every whim. Secretly, I root for The Godfather, not because I think pimping is an estimable profession...
...belief that WWF is undeniably horrible as an institution was only been confirmed by my ring side seat. The morals, gender codes and so-called patriotism it condones make my stomach queasy. The wrestlers are over-paid to do nothing (they don't even look particularly good in those spandex things), and, as performers, could use some work. Wrestling lessons would be at the top of my list, with a few lessons on acting as a close second and haircuts a definite third. As I watched yet another wrestler gesture at his groin, I realized that my mace was futile...
...drop off Maela; she giggles thanks, and in comes Belgis, about 40, pregnant, in a white frilly blouse and floral spandex leggings. She was waiting for three hours. She was visiting her family, and is on her way to Playa Yaguardabo to see her in-laws, 10 minutes up the road. We get there, and she's out. Condela stays put and seems perturbed--the back seat is not so big--when we welcome a young couple, Alexander and Yaineris, who bustle in, exhaling with relief. They have a chicken with them. A live chicken. Condela laughs at our surprise...
LANCE ARMSTRONG Spandex surprise: overcomes testicular cancer, churlish sponsors--except Postal Service--to win Tour de France...