Word: spud
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...SPUD TROUBLE...
Experimentation sometimes produces disasters, like the chocolate-and cinnamon-flavored fries introduced and quickly shelved by Heinz last year. But for food purveyors, taking risks has become essential as weight-conscious and fry-fatigued consumers abandon the deep-fried spud. Americans ordered 900 million fewer servings of fries over the 12 months ending in May, a sharp 10% drop compared with the previous year, according to research to be published in October by the NPD Group, a market-research firm that has been charting American eating patterns for 18 years. That's a lot of taters, and it represents...
...they say the trend extends across class and region. The combination of double shifts, shrinking vacations, fear of boredom and competitive instincts conspires to clog our kids' summer just as much as the rest of the year. Even camp isn't likely to be about s'mores and spud anymore: there is math camp and weight camp and leadership camp, as though summer were about perfecting ourselves, when in fact the opposite may be true...
Margo, you're missing out. Great advances have been made in the field of throwing down recently. 5'4 Spud Webb won the 1986 NBA Slam Dunk Contest. Slovenian guard Marko Milic once dunked over a Honda Del Sol. Vince Carter leaped over the head of a French seven-footer at the Olympics this past summer...
...character. Not only does Renee Zellwegger have zero personality as Irene, but the entire movie is one frenetic fart joke without even an instant of relief. And what's with the 'sticking [insert various objects here] up an ass' gags? The creators of the infamous hair gel and the Spud on speed surely can come up with something better than that...