Word: stewardess
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...Boeing 727 jet called Leadership 80 is rattling through a cobblestoned stretch of sky, descending toward its third landing of the day. In the first cabin a stewardess is picking up crockery and leftovers; a reporter steals some conversation with a campaign official; Aides Mike Deaver and Stu Spencer gab about the next stop...
Everybody remembers Gwen from Airport (the original, that is, when it was plot enough to have a regular plane with a pregnant stewardess--no fancy water dives, Concordes or singing nuns for Arthur Hailey). She was the one who divided her time between stealing the little liquor bottles and getting it on with unhappily married pilot Dean Martin when the co-pilot left the cockpit. And then there was Earthquake, that child of the San Andreas fault, which co-starred Charlton Heston, a house that chased after its inhabitants and the marvels of Sensurround. And what about Hurricane, Avalanche...
...then faint dead away. It all sounds rather dull until some passengers, the navigator, the co-pilot and the pilot (played by the wonderfully straight Peter "Good morning Mr. Phelps" Graves) happen to choose fish for dinner. Then things begin to happen. The plane goes out of control, the stewardess switches on the automatic pilot and the doctor (played by Leslie "Watch me tackle that wave" Nielsen) manages to convince the control stick-shy former Air Force pilot into guiding the plane to the ground. In short, the shit hits...
...ground and Lloyd "Sea Hunt" Bridges plays the glue-sniffing, heavy-drinking chain-smoking director of the Chicago airport. Mixed in with the emergency, as one might guess, is a romance between the Air Force pilot turned taxi driver, played by the ingenuous Robert Hays, and the stewardess who takes over the co-pilot's chair from Kareem Abdul-Jabar. Julie Hagarty plays the sallow, teary type--she's sure to snag a nighttime sitcom role from this appearance...
...whose intrepid, chunky comic -strip hero survives a series of boyhood crises. Pilgrim's Regress, edited by Joel Wells (Thomas More Press; 127 pages; $8.95), is a collection of cartoons both secular and otherwordly, selected from the pages of the liberal Catholic journal The Critic. Here a prim stewardess warns a passenger, "You can't read erotic books while we're in Irish air space," and two dour leprechauns, spotting a leprechaun bishop under a toadstool, observe. "So much for our carefree, puckish way of life." Funny fauna inhabit Animals, Animals, Animals, edited by George Booth, Gahan...