Word: stupidity
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...This is both a huge annoyance for quad folk AND a safety risk, given the apparently large number of lecherous Harvard men who wait in the wings on weekend nights. This is probably a lot worse than the hot breakfast cuts, though I'm sure somebody will have some stupid snarky reply about how 'THE QUAD SUCKS BRO.. BUT YUM I LOVE PANCAKES...
...Luckily, I can drive anyone to a point where they get so annoyed that they yell something stupid. Josh yelled that I could write one more column about hockey during this incredibly exciting playoff season, but it had better make a convincing argument about how excellent hockey is. If I failed to convince, TIME.com readers could vote to bar me for life from ever referring to the sport again (vote below). Therefore, this is the most important column I'll ever write. Unless, of course, you vote to keep the hockey pieces coming, in which case there's a super...
...brought the Stanley Cup to a pawnshop. The league has even offered to let me be commissioner for a day. When I pitched that last idea, Josh said, "If the NHL would let you be commissioner for a year, we'd have something. Because then you'd change that stupid sport...
...research comports with a growing body of data saying that exercise by itself has far less to do with your body mass than you think. In short, it's the calories, stupid. You can exercise all you want, which will surely make you healthier - reducing your risk of heart disease, diabetes and dementia, for instance - but unless you eat better, or less, it may do nothing to make you thin. All that money we have spent to get kids into P.E. might be better spent helping schools to serve fresh fruits and vegetables at lunch instead of tater tots...
...Please stop telling everyone to get bikes. It is stupid. If I wanted a damn bike, I'd have gotten one already. I don't want one. It's expensive, I can't carry stuff with me, it might get stolen, and when there is a blizzard on December 15 next year in the middle of finals, you won't be able to use it. You can't wear a suit or other dress clothes on one, especially in the winter when they will get ruined.” (Mckinsey's info sesh, 2:45am, Faculty Club...