Word: sugars
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Best of all, the man knew his audience. He didn't rail against our lack of an attention span; he played to it. The minute that big, easily bored, sugar-fueled baby that is the American public started to drift off, he'd grab a straw hat and a banjo and somehow get us back. And so we never turned him off. We sat and watched, grinning and glassy-eyed, waiting expectantly to see what the funny man with the fat red nose would do next...
...SUGAR COATING Sometimes timing really is everything. A blood test used to screen for Type 2 diabetes may miss as many as half of all cases if it's performed in the afternoon rather than the morning. Turns out glucose levels--normal is considered below 125mg/dl--naturally drop through the day, so what appears fine in the afternoon may, in fact, be a problem. Easy solution: lower the standard for what's "normal" for blood drawn...
...coffee c) sugar d) marijuana...
Next, I embarked on a 24-hour cinnamon-bun-baking marathon, blending some 11 cups of flour, six cups of sugar, a pound of butter and various other ingredients into an array of sweet treats. Martha Stewart's maddeningly precise and time-consuming recipe almost drove me to the pop-open cans, while AllRecipes' obtuse instructions and cake-mix ingredients struck me as suspect. I liked Epicurious' tip for using a sandwich bag with a hole in the bottom corner to drizzle on glaze like a pro, and found cooking.com's guidelines to be the most straightforward...
...MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE (Fox). More lovable than Raymond, more destructive than Ebola, the sugar-buzzed Malcolm dropped a firecracker down the shorts of the family-sitcom genre. Jane Kaczmarek, as ferocious, loyal Lois, is not just a mom but the life force...