Word: survivor
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...what's got them in such a state? Well, on Wednesday's episode of CBS's hit show "Survivor," the islanders were seen hunting, grilling and, yes, eating the wild rats that populate the tropical paradise. The animal-rights group is reportedly "horrified" that the network would permit such inhumane treatment of the rats (which apparently are so numerous they run roughshod over sleeping cast members...
Unfortunately for CBS, logic does not seem to be a strong point among many protesters, a point that no doubt has the honchos at the Tiffany network sweating in their suits as they consider the other groups who might have a complaint as a result of the "Survivor" show...
Think about it - the PETA protest could be just the first pebble in an avalanche of action against "Survivor" as angry people everywhere find an aspect of the show they don't like. And it might get nasty - after all, if the show's got a cool million to hand out to the last sap left on the island, they can certainly scrape together a handsome out-of-court settlement for some "victim" with restitution on his or her mind. (Too bad they kicked that nice lawyer off the show...
...here, in a fit of generosity toward the most successful current show on television, are TIME.com's predictions as to the players (and their complaints) in the next generation of "Survivor" protests...
...island unto himself, and besides, pretty much nobody really lives on an island these days. Once we have worked through these (and many other) issues, we would also recommend that CBS send its staff to us for at least a year of intensive sessions. Please send those poor 'Survivor' cast-offs as well. (We'd be happy to work out some sort of bulk-rate discount...