Word: tellingly
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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Coming out--that is, revealing to others one's attractions--is necessary for dignity. It is an expression of one's passions without remorse or apology. It is so rare that we are able, as a society, to tell others how we really feel. Thus, telling our friends, families and potential partners what we've been thinking about all these years establishes a bond so profound that even the most ignorant bigot (or the most strident gay activist) can neither sever nor belittle it. It is for these reasons that coming out should be encouraged (when the time is right...
...tell...
...weeks, she was posing for French Glamour. "It's not that I wanted to model," she says, sounding for all the world like the survivor of an accident too gory to describe in detail. "It just happened. At first I thought it was...like a joke. I didn't tell them I was a musician. I didn't want to confuse them. But I am a person who is serious, and from the Day One, I wasn't completely happy, because I wanted to play concerts. There was a point when I thought there was no hope. No cello...
...sometimes Suma, 16, and Usha, 13, find their grandparents' sense of tradition onerous. The girls like to wear jeans and shorts, which Rajaram abhors. Then Meera steps in as interpreter. "I tell them, 'Your grandparents' definition of pretty is someone in a sari and not someone in short shorts. You've got to remember where your grandparents come from.'" So far, the disputes have been trivial. But trouble could erupt if the girls decide, say, to marry outside their ethnic group. Rajaram is already steeling himself for the battle--and his likely defeat. "I'll try to talk them...
Finally, these recycled parents are often forced to negotiate an unfamiliar bureaucracy, seeking welfare assistance or legal custody, enrolling kids in school or getting medical care. "The underlying problem is that they don't understand what their rights are and nobody can tell them," says Gerard Wallace, director of the Grandparent Caregiver Law Center at the Brookdale Center on Aging in New York. There is little in law books to help; attorneys and social workers are often unsure how existing laws apply...