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What you need to do is make these first days count. Harvard students have on average a scant 2.75 sex partners during their time here. But what the statistics don’t tell you is that the first experience occurs during Camp Harvard, the other during Senior Week, and the only thing to keep you going in between is that fraction of a person you will meet one lonely winter’s night in the Quad. That’s what people mean when they say make these first days count—otherwise it?...
...Your second day of freshman week will likely begin with language placement tests. Rest assured that they are indeed harder than SAT IIs (or just tell yourself that after you receive a 500 on the exam after taking 7 years of high school Spanish). Then you’ll have a mandatory lunch with your academic adviser, who might happen to be helpful, engaged, and appropriately matched to your interests—but more likely not. Make the best of what you get, and consider scheduling a second appointment to ask specific questions about classes and scheduling. If your professor...
...event/info session/comp meeting/seminar/movie showing/date event, they will do so by offering you free food. Do not be hoodwinked. True, it will taste better than dining hall fare. And, true, it will cost nothing. But showing up to everything “just for the food” is a tell-tale sign that the 15 are on their way. So, be judicious. If you know you’re going to be a Chemistry concentrator, skip the Psychology department’s “Burritos, Brain, and Behavior.” But when there’s dessert from...
...what are your choices? We’ve constructed a pyramid to serve as your guide to the key food groups of the Square—burritos, pizza, burgers, ice cream, and The Kong. The pyramid is not designed to tell you what you should eat (it’s all basically unhealthy), but more of a breakdown of what you will...
...real life, I was in the midst of an awkward conversation about end-of-life issues with my father when Sarah Palin raised the remarkable idea that the Obama Administration's attempt to include such issues in its health-care-reform proposal would lead to "death panels." Let me tell you something about my family situation, a common one these days, in order to illuminate the obscenity of Palin's formulation and the cowardice of those, like Senator Charles Grassley of Iowa, the lead Republican negotiator on the Senate Finance Committee, who have refused to contest her claim...