Word: tina
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...invited to. The List is managed by the Status Police, who seem to employ a system that is all Vanity and very little Fair. Those who do make it inside are sometimes left wondering what the fuss was all about. But what was once a figment (of then-editor) Tina Brown's imagination has now become the ultimate litmus test of one's Hollywood clout...
...attempt gracious victory by clapping both hands to her face and yelling "Oh my God!" several times. (Alicia didn't buy it - is it me, or did she actually get kind of likable this week?) And as Jerri and Amber dined on seafood and iced tea and snarked about Tina and her own clumsy emotional fakery, the remaining seven seemed perfectly happy to hunker around the fire with another starch buffet...
...danger of confusing himself with his own machinations. Maybe with a little help from the editors, though, the plan took shape clearly enough: He's telling Jerri - who cornered him right after getting the post-meal cold shoulder from the chummy Barramundian Seven - that he's letting Keith and Tina think he's with them till the end, but really he's with Jerri and Amber. But really, he's with Keith and Tina, against Jerri and Amber - although can you trust a man wearing sunglasses to tell the truth about lying...
...Keith is pulling an image rehab that would make Nixon proud. With public opinion turning against Jerri, the whiny, sad-sack chef to the stars (two presidents, he said) is looking socially acceptable and a cool hand at the immunity challenges to boot. Tina gave him the last one, but this week's - a seriously convoluted pole-and-rope puzzle in which the most squares won - was all Chef. Following Jerri, he slapped down 17 placards like he was afraid of running out of them, and sweetest of sweet ironies, it was Jerri...
...with my fantasy baseball joke, my reason for living would not have been shattered at an early age. So play wisely, my friends. Victory will grant you a joy matched by no other (I heard you, Shaggy). But defeat can make you feel like a little [expletive]. As Tina from Survivor said, let the games begin...