Word: toilets
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Legend has it that Martin Luther had his eureka moment, which sparked the Protestant Reformation, while sitting on the toilet. Here at Harvard, we all aspire to alter history in our own ways, and nearly all of us spend a few minutes a day pondering existence on the john...
This is why students in some Houses have been chafing over the recent switch in toilet paper. In Dunster House, students who had grown accustomed to the soft touch of Kleenex Cottonelle—truly the ivory tower of TP—have been disappointed by the recent loss of this brand. In its place is Scott Surpass (also made by Kimberly-Clark), but the touch resembles that of a porcupine and puts an end to all profound thought...
...Toilet paper distribution for the rest of the Houses is handled by Facilities Maintenance Operations (FMO). According to Robert Wolfreys, a supervisor for FMO who oversees Dorm Crew, Scott is the brand distributed to most of campus. Xpedex, which distributes the toilet paper to most of FMO gets a special price on Scott from the manufacturer because the University buys so much of it. So residents of FMO-supplied Houses have been suffering—to the detriment of their intellectual musings—under the rough touch of Scott for quite some time...
Seven years ago, Crimson columnist Geoffrey C. Upton ’99 complained that his one-ply toilet paper just wasn’t cutting it. He pointed out that then Dean of the College Harry R. Lewis ’68 didn’t go home and use the scratchy, one-ply stuff. His piece inspired the creation of the Harvard College Toilet Paper Commission, which made the change from one-ply to two-ply after months of deliberation. Today, we ask Dean of the College Benedict H. Gross ’71 if he would want...
...former Republican Senator of Delaware from 1971 to 2001 best known as the architect of a popular tax-sheltered retirement account; of heart failure; in Washington. A budget watchdog who once discovered that the Defense Department was paying $9,600 for a wrench and $640 for a toilet seat, he co-sponsored the 1981 Kemp-Roth tax cuts that became a centerpiece of Reaganomics. His Roth IRA first became available in 1998, allowing people to make tax-free withdrawals for retirement, education or first-time home purchases...