Word: tracks
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...donate money to the U.S. Speedskating team, whose largest commercial cash sponsor, Dutch bank DSB, just went belly-up. (Colbert snarkily referred to DSB as "Deposit Savings in Bong.") In exchange for the publicity and potential revenue, Colbert Nation logos will be stitched onto the suits of both long-track and short-track skaters during World Cup competitions before the Olympics. Right now, the long-track team is preparing for a competition in Berlin, while the short trackers are in Montreal for a meet. "We are scrambling like crazy to get the logos on the uniforms this weekend," says...
...deal. "My gut reaction was, 'Great,' " says Crowley. "It's a unique sponsorship opportunity, and you know what? It's going to be fun." The market price for sponsorship logos on speedskating suits is $100,000. Colbert will get a logo on the leg and hood of the long-track skaters; on the short-track athletes, the Colbert Nation mark will be stitched on the leg and chest. "A bit embarrassing that our leadership couldn't secure other sponsors three months before the Olympic Games," short-track star Apolo Ohno wrote to TIME in an e-mail...
Plus, many Olympic speedskaters don't take themselves too seriously. "We're Olympic athletes, and that in itself deserves respect," says Katherine Reutter, a short-track skater who will be competing in her first Olympics in Vancouver. "But we race around in little circles in full-body spandex. There's plenty of stuff to make fun of." And who knows? Those jokes may pay for her medal...
When the news broke in January that wall street executives were paying themselves handsomely for piloting the U.S. economy into a mountainside, President Obama's response was unequivocal. "It is shameful," he said. Ten months later, even as he moved to curb bailed-out execs' pay, banks are on track to pay employees a record $140 billion this year. Andrew Hall, a star trader at Citi's commodities unit Phibro, made headlines for what could be a $100 million payout. "Frustrating," said White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel with a sigh, appearing on CBS's Face the Nation...
...assistance. When H.M.A.S. Armidale, an Australian naval ship, approached the troubled craft, they found 78 Sri Lankan Tamil asylum seekers heading for Australia. Unsurprisingly, their wooden boat was not seaworthy, and those on board were transferred to the Oceanic Viking, an armed patrol vessel used by Australian customs to track poachers of the highly endangered Patagonian toothfish in these waters...