Word: troyer
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Market research is notoriously pliable, but even before Team Yao started mining the report, companies were at the door. "We chose him because we just thought he was hipper than other people around," says Apple CEO Steve Jobs, who cast Yao opposite Verne (Mini-Me) Troyer in an ad for the firm's new notebook computers. Visa built its Super Bowl ad around Yao's brief English-speaking debut ("Can I write a check?" he asks...
...Steve Jobs, who typically unveils one mystery product at the end of his keynote address, this time revealed a surprisingly large heap of new gear. Two dimension-conscious laptops grabbed headlines: the world's widest, with a 17-in. screen ($3,299, as carried by Mini-Me actor Verne Troyer) and the world's smallest, with a 12-in. screen ($1,799, endorsed by NBA giant Yao Ming). Their coolest feature: keyboards that automatically light up in the dark...
...owls that swoop through his school, Hogwarts, dropping mail on the magically gifted boys and girls; from Hogwarts' Great Hall with its soaring night-sky ceiling to the cavernous vaults and Munchkin-size goblins working in Gringotts bank (keep an eye out for Verne Troyer, who played Mini-Me in the 1999 Austin Powers sequel); from the wizard's version of chess, in which queens and knights come alive and beat each other senseless, to the Quidditch field, where young witches and wizards on broomsticks fly through the air playing a magical hybrid of basketball and soccer; from Hagrid...
PASS THE KEY If you share a car with Shaquille O'Neal or Verne Troyer, this is the invention you've been waiting for. Mercedes-Benz is introducing a high-tech SmartKey with its 2001 models that remembers exactly how you like to set up your car's interior: where you position the seat, at what angle you like the mirrors, your preferred air-conditioning setting. The second you turn on the ignition, the car rearranges itself for your pleasure. Of course, you could change the settings yourself, but that would be too much like work...
...your own words, Mr. Troyer, your language "veers between stupid and racist." Cynthia M. Monaco