Word: turkeys
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Dates: during 1970-1979
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...great number of our countrymen will not be cooking ye Xmas turkey or ye mince pie at all. They are instead preparing outlandish dishes that I can barely spelle or pronownce. These platters have such names as ortolans á la périgourdine, chausson de jambon au foie gras et truffes, polio in umido, media yemista, klephtiko charti, kalua pig, civet de lievre, poularde de Bresse a la demi-deuil, moussaka, agnello in vescica con ginepro, frit-tatas, beignets, gaufrettes, gazpacho, gefullte Schweinerippchen, pastello di pesce, dim sum, kaeng keao wan, shashlik, crudites, ratatouille, pho, ktapodi krassato, calfs head (aargh!) caillou...
...espy one couple who had obtained a turkey. 'Twas a far cry from the scrawny skitterlings we used to pursue through the Virginia woods, a fleshy, full-breasted creature, almost sinful withal. And what were they doing with said bird...
...They were out in their garden, digging a hole big enough to bury a pirate's hoard of doubloons. In that cavity they were planning to plant ye turkey. 'But why on earth, or rather in earth?' I wittily enquired. 'Because of Bocuse,' they explained. 'In the gospel according to St. Paul, on page 258 of his newe book-the great French chef relays the recipe of his grandpere, to wit: bury the bird for two full days before the feast. Digit...
With the onset of Christmas vacation, the time has come for the trackmen to cool their jets. For a time, at least, until Northeastern rears its ugly head on January 14. If the Crimson can regain its momentum, however, it should prove another prime opportunity for more turkey-shooting...
...depicting "a healthy attitude toward sex, mixed in with a spiritual message," says Flynt. "We will no longer treat women as pieces of meat." Specifically, Flynt plans to discontinue vaginal closeups, banish all flesh from the cover and sanitize a few regular features: "Asshole of the Month" will become "Turkey of the Month," for instance, and "Chester the Molester" will be renamed "Chester the Protector" and reassigned to guarding young girls from evil. Flynt does not say what will become of nude photo spreads or of Flynt's thriving mail-order sex-aids business. Says one bewildered Hustler staff...