Word: unchosen
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...serendipity are at odds. Some universities, stores, television broadcasters, and government offices promote the echo chamber; others promote serendipity. My suggestion is that for good lives, good universities, and good societies, the power of self-sorting is at best a mixed blessing. However unpleasant and jarring they can be, unchosen, unanticipated encounters play a crucial role; they are indispensable not only to education but also to citizenship itself. Far from wishing them away, we should welcome them...
Envisioning what life would have been like with an alternate spouse becomes difficult and increasingly irrelevant as you settle into the life you've selected. "Once you make a choice in life, the unchosen alternatives evaporate," he says. According to Gilbert's earlier research, which he featured in his 2006 book, Stumbling on Happiness, when faced with an irrevocable decision, people are happier with the outcome than when they have the opportunity to change their minds. "It's a very powerful phenomenon," he says. "This is really the difference between dating and marriage...
...Biblical expos?e, which I read in 1994, had a headline that read, as I recall, "Second Coming Came and Went!" The story reported that Jesus had returned as He'd promised and taken all the chosen souls back to Heaven with Him. The rest of us, the unchosen, might have thought we were still on Earth, but we were actually living in Hell...
...expected, never consented to. She surely thought that in her 28 years she had been building a life of joys and loves, struggle and achievement, friendship and fellowship. That and everything else she built her life into were simply swallowed up by the notoriety of her death, a notoriety unchosen and unbidden...
...real shame is that treatment does work. The overwhelming majority of research concludes that pedophilia is an innate - thus unchosen - condition, one that produces more suffering than pleasure, but that can be controlled. Berlin and others working with pedophiles use a combination of talk therapy, abstinence training based on the Alcohol Anonymous model and, when necessary, libido-suppressing drugs. In one study of 400 of Berlin's patients, less than 3% who fully cooperated with treatment relapsed after five years. Other studies show that when pedophiles are not treated, nearly 18% of them offend again within three to five years...