Word: unicorn
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Here's a simple rule for filmmakers: If an actress of Helen Mirren's caliber is willing to mount a white unicorn for you, don't squander the image. That's what director Iain Softley does in Inkheart, his sloppy, aggravatingly frenetic adaptation of Cornelia Funke's popular fantasy novel about fictional characters who spring to life when the right person reads them aloud...
...Mostly what Capricorn does is send people to his many dungeons, which are loaded with discards from other Silvertongue incidents, including some of Frank Baum's flying monkeys, a Minotaur and that white unicorn. This cast traipses in and out of more small dark rooms than someone looking for a studio apartment in New York City. And when they're not being thrown in a dungeon, they're either fleeing from the castle or trying to sneak back in. Whatever they seek, they generally find, but then forget...
...Capricorn's henchman land in the middle of Kansas, post-tornado. But the internal story, the meta-Inkheart as penned by Fenoglio, never comes into focus; if I were Capricorn, I'd want to escape its tedious pages as well. And if I were Mirren, I'd steer that unicorn right off the screen...
...could be pathological computer users, and internet addiction is rapidly gaining acceptance as a psychological disorder. Go cold turkey...I dare you. 5. It’s obsolete Whatever device you are reading this on, Apple just released a glossy multi-touch version molded from a single piece of unicorn horn. Smash your computer so you have an excuse to buy a new one. —Mark A. VanMiddlesworth is the incoming l337 Web Editor...
...you’ll recognize her as Mel from “Flight of the Conchords”) and a man decked out in tan flannel travel from Tokyo to Paris in another cardboard box. The deliveries of weapons labeled “mutiny” to a furry unicorn and a comely bear reveal the ultimate literality of this video; the plot sequence sticks closely to the lyrics, like a child’s storybook, though the video is made more complex and obscure by a puckish dark-humored whimsicality. Collectively, these elements are fitting for a New Pornographers?...