Word: utensil
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...trivial offenses. Much worse, he testified, when he was seven, Jose "would be in the bathroom, and he'd put me on my knees. He'd guide me in all my movements, and I'd have oral sex with him." Also, "he used objects, a toothbrush, some sort of utensil brush . . . he'd take my pants off, lay me on the bed. He'd have a tube of Vaseline, and he'd just play with me." Worse yet, "he raped me." Lyle testified that he took out some of his rage by violating Erik with a toothbrush. On the stand...
...RELENTLESS STRUGGLE BETWEEN ATHLETES and team owners for a bigger slice of professional sports' financial pie, control of free agency has been the utensil of choice. Last week, following a 36-day trial, a federal court dropped the owners' favorite fork on the floor, ruling that the National Football League's limited free-agency plan was illegal and awarding four players $1.6 million in damages. The decision will probably lead to a less restrictive agreement and higher salaries...
...recent visit, a $22.50 slice of red, utensil-repellent beef purported to be a medium well-done filet mignon. A paltry serving of sickly-looking lamb chops masqueraded as a rack of lamb (quote pretentious name from menu). A selection of fish dishes were uniformly dry and disappointing. A side order of hollandaise sauce could have come from your grocer's freezer. A self-professed lobster bisque was decidedly lean on the lobster...
Some are reminiscent of the rabbinical parables Singer heard his father tell in Poland. A rich miser lends his neighbor a silver spoon. Next day the borrower returns the utensil, and brings with it a smaller one because "your tablespoon gave birth to a teaspoon." Delighted, the miser offers a set of candlesticks, only to learn, two days later, that they have passed away. "How can candlesticks die?" screams the rich man. Greed gets a talmudic reply: "If spoons can give birth, candlesticks...
...Italians took him at his word, celebrating Menotti's 60th birthday with brass bands, torchlight processions and 2,000 signed testimonials of affection. Awakened by a rendition of his own Triple Concerto, the composer sniffled: "Before this I felt like an ornament. Now I feel like a household utensil, and it's wonderful...