Word: waitere
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...with a huge scary bull, and the dark, musty air of the feedstore across the road, and railroad tracks, where I flattened pennies when the Chicago Flyer came by. Now some guy named Bruce is advancing on my boyhood with a gigantic pepper mill, saying he'll be my waiter for tonight. Yes, thanks, Bruce, I'll need a little time. Actually, I will need a trip to Ellsworth...
...Judy Florida," White laughs. "What a riot! He's an old friend, a writer who tells his old mother that he's a waiter. You know the one about the waiter who tells everyone he's really a writer -- well, this is just the reverse. His mother doesn't really know, and he's quite famous. He writes under the pen name of Andrew Holleran. Have you ever heard of Dancer from the Dance? He's the most famous gay writer in America...
...organize a marathon bridge game or keep fraternity brothers awake while thwokking a lacrosse ball off his wall, then handle his homework in an hour or so before class. Bush is so exquisitely considerate that at meals, without breaking conversation, he will shift his water glass to give the waiter more room as he arrives with the soup. When Sununu receives guests in his White House office, he will pour himself a cup of coffee (he drinks only decaf, which everyone agrees is a good thing) and grab a handful of M&M's without offering anything to anyone else...
...there at the same time as a banker she has been dating, then his trying to sneak off in the morning without saying goodbye. He tells her he is involved with someone else. She slips into near hysteria, making jokes (she says they are funny) about the waiter, the croissants, the plates, the Ayatullah. They part, but she calls him later in the day to have dinner at a "hilariously hip restaurant." Of course, he says no. Any greater rebuke to her fatal attraction and she might be tempted to boil the rabbit...
Cullen Gerst's "just-the-facts" cameo as a gay waiter is refreshing because it contrasts so sharply with the rest of the performances. At one point Bruce exclaims, "Mrs. Wallace could give me lithium, she could give you speed; we could meet somewhere in the middle." I wish this production had learned some-thing from that...