Word: witch
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Dates: during 2000-2009
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Whenever I stop and find myself contemplating the original Blair Witch Project (something that doesn't seem to occur all that often), I almost always realize that my thoughts never seem to dwell on the actual movie itself. Because really, what made that novel, dirt-cheap, better-in-concept-than-execution horror film explode into an orgiastic pop culture triumph was all the creativity that went on outside of it. Directors Eduardo Sanchez and Daniel Myrick didn't come close to producing the most starkly terrifying film ever (still Jaws, hands down), yet their marketing campaign...
...Blair Witch Project may have been riddled with flaws, but it was still one of the most unique films in years, so how can Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 possibly match that level of inventiveness? Well, the simple answer is that it doesn't even attempt to. Packaged and shipped barely a year after the original, BW2 is a painfully mediocre, decidedly unimaginative horror movie that does little more than ride the first Blair Witch's coattails and proves every bit as derivative as its predecessor was clever. The first mistake was in thinking that a workable sequel could...
...producers, to their credit, made an intriguing move in selecting documentary filmmaker Joe Berlinger (Paradise Lost) to helm the project. On paper, the choice is inspired-who better to tackle the pseudo-reality of the Blair Witch than a man who's spent his entire career grappling with the constructs of the non-fictional? But whatever documentary instincts Berlinger may have honed over the years can't help his script, co-written with Dick Beebe, which unfolds with all the imagination and genre-challenging of a "Tales From the Crypt" episode. The premise at least taps nicely into the vein...
...make a public service announcement." I agreed. So here's her PSA: "Do not see Lost Souls. No matter how much money they offer you or candy they promise to feed you, resist!"... Speaking of lost souls, why are they predicting a $30 million opening weekend for Blair Witch 2? I can't find one person who wants to see it. Then again, I couldn't find one person who admitted to buying Oops, I Did It Again....I'm still having nightmares about Debauchery ("I'm not surprised," chimes in a blockmate. "How could you forget that stench...
...cover versions. I feel anything that brings a good song back to attention is a good thing, even if the cover is execrable (hello, Sheryl Crow). Marilyn Manson is going to cover "Suicide is Painless"-the theme song to M*A*S*H-on the soundtrack to the Blair Witch Project sequel. Is it just me, or is the whole Manson thing way too tired? But it's a great song, so bleak ("Suicide is painless/It brings on many changes/And I can take or leave it as I please") that the lyrics had to be excised for the TV version...